`tHe NeVeReNdInG fAiRyTaLe~hApPiLy EvEr AfTeR iS nOt ThAt FaR iS iT?` RyAn & MiNdY

Tuesday, March 21, 2006
3:52 PM

~a new beginning...~

I’m thankful I’ve a 2nd chance at putting tings rite. Dear dear I’m happy 2 change 4 my own gd n our rs. Sumtimes it seems dat 1 needs 2 lose sumting b4 realising dat d tings they lost means everyting 2 them. My love 4 my dear dear is growing deeper wif each passing day n dis incident brings us closer 2 each other. I understand him better now n it’s true it takes time 2 learn n understand a person.. I wld say I’m enjoying d process of discovery abt him n myself more. N I can better understand y he do d tings he do n try 2 look at his perspective instead of juz drowning in my own emotions wich cloud my judgment most times.. It’s true u’ve 2 sink d deepest abyss so dat u can b reborn n emerge stronger.. N everyting bcomes clearer n u will gain a deeper insight 2 wat u always 1 2 no or want in life.

Sunday 1st time I played pool at wk. My assistant supervisor, May, taught me hw 2 hold d cue correctly n break properly. Joe d snooker coach mentioned dat I can join his young cousin 4 a snooker lesson next sun “) he always says dat his sec 3 niece resembles me n he’ll try 2 get her 2 come.. hope she can make it next sun s it’s my last day of wk at pool haven.. curious 2 no whether we really look alike. Hoping 2 get my pay soon so I can ve lessons wif Joe so I’ll b able 2 play pool n snooker well.

Recently I’ve discovered I’m becoming senile.. 4get tings ezily (stuff I’ve done or said a while ago) n keep losing stuff.. sat, I left my soft ballet shoes n pointe shoes in d studio after class.. N I only realized it upon packing my bag when I reached hm.. juz an eg of hw old I’m progressing. My mem, hearing n sight r deteriorating at a rapid rate.. ve 2 go check my eyesight dis wk again coz I can’t c clearly wif my glasses n contacts. Having 900 deg myopia n >100 deg astigmatism in each eye at last check, I guess I’m becoming almost blind soon.. guess probably it’ll only stop getting worse after I finish my deg coz n I’ll need lasik 2 correct my vision which I’m afraid of..

Watched V 4 Vendetta on sat wif my dear dear.. It was fantastic!! I suppose those who disliked dis movie didn’t understand d political n philosophical meaning beneath it (Weird dat so many ppl disliked dis movie).. it’s not another mindless action movie s it’s portrayed in d trailer. If u go in expecting sum wham bam action, u will get ur kicks at certain scenes.. but certainly u’ll dislike it if u hate listening 2 long speeches or dialogues.. d dialogues were necessary 2 understand d ideology of freedom.. Althgh d setting was based in England, there was a parallel in our real life of US 2day.. d chancellor was an exaggerated version of George W Bush.. d government in d movie seems 2 b similar 2 d 1 in US.. n mention of terrorists n biological weapons? This is 2 coincidental 2 b juz another fictional movie. It’s like taking jibes at d way US is being governed. I agree wif d theme of idealogy being v important in moulding ppl’s destinies.. Even in death, embracing n having faith in wat 1 truly believe gifs meaning 2 1’s life..How powerful ideas can b, even more so than ppl who r living.. in real life, ppl are actually quite self-centred.. they dun value ideology coz in their lives they choose 2 value materialistic principles.. This movie is rather thgt-provoking: It raises d issue of wat freedom n loyalty is, whether it’s worth it 2 die 4 one’s beliefs n corruption in hierarchy, how fake n hypocritical ppl can b (wearing masks figuratively in day to day lives).. it’s rare these days 2 c such movies ard.. A political parody n satire disguised s a popcorn movie 4 d mainstream, which ironically pisses off d mainstream audience coz they feel they kana cheated when they dun understand d deeper meaning behind d movie... Hope more of such excellent movies r created… instead of d trash which r showing in d cinemas these days.. case in point look at Shaggy Dog.

After wk on sunday i went online, thgt I wld chat wif a fren whom I haven’t kept in touch 4 a while n he surprised me (shocked wld b more accurate). It’s like he suddenly told me he’s horny n stressed out.. N asked me 2 engage in phone sex wif him. Noing fully well I’ve a bf dis suggestion is way inappropriate n disrespectful.. n he said it’s not wrong since it’s not physical. I just felt dat throughout d whole time he was attempting 2 use me s his target 2 get off his sexual frustration. I kept explaining 2 him in a nice manner dat I wasn’t going 2 engage in dis type of discussion wif him.. N he decided 2 settle 4 a confession session instead.. n it’s related 2 sex again.. I mean hello? Wat has my sex life (or lack of) got 2 do wif u n he kept asking me how often I masturbate. If u r stressed or troubled I dun mind listening 2 ur problems but don’t ask me 2 do ridiculous tings like dis 4 u n treat me like sum kind of mechanism 4 u 2 jerk off 2. Jus pissed me off but somehow I managed 2 keep my composure n told him I was turning in n logged off fr msn. I’m broad-minded but this doesn’t mean I’m cheap or I’m comfortable sharing intimate details of my life wif u, even more so esp if u r just a normal fren. I’m entitled 2 details of my life n don’t force me 2 share this wif u if u r my fren. Just let me realize dat sum ppl can really b ridiculous. At least I no he’s not a true fren. When I said gdnite 2 him, repeated wa laus n argh punctuated d n of d conversation.. I cldn’t care less anymore. Tis is sexual harassment in my opinion. N he’s like 23 wif d immaturity of a 13 yr old wif raging hormones. It’s like he doesn’t respect me at all. Anyway, hope watever’s bothering him will clear soon n he stops behaving like dis.

Hee.. quite ecstatic I’ll b meeting up wif my frens this week.. esp since I haven’t kept in touch wif many of them 4 sum time due 2 my bz schedule of sch n wk since d start of d yr.. must make full use of dis wk.. 1der how’s every1 is getting on.. hope evry1 is doing well n fine.. hmm.. just feel dat I’ve v little time 2 enjoy my break.. 1 wk+ is really short! Looking 4wd 2 seeing my fave frens! “)

imlost...
inafairytale