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~LyRiCaL sTaR~
Name:SnOw
Age:23
email:obsessedwithblue@hotmail.com (for msn and friendster)
Birthday:07 Nov 1983
Horoscope:Scorpio
Lurves
Darling Ryan
People who care esp my besties, gd pals, bro
being different
dreaming
Hates
Deceit
Broken promises
Hopes for
Happiness
I'll be with my darling for a lifetime
Darling will enjoy happiness, success and good health
bro and elisa get back together
happiness and good health for my family and friends
being able to smile on my birthday this year
More tangible stuff
A 2B bike license
A better digital camera *greedy peeg >.<
Sony Ericsson k800i mobile phone
Good grades for school
Pass my Advanced I ballet exam next year (with flying colors not just a pass, gee i wished for a pass in my inter exam n i got just dat. Grr)
Reach my goal of 45kg (Y does it seem so far away? Haiz.. Lack of self-ctrl.. I'll sell my soul just to be thin)
Friday, March 10, 2006
12:29 AM
~The opp of love is not hate, it's apathy~
Drained emotionally, mentally n physically. Exhausted. Waiting 4 d breaking pt. Having questions wif no answers ..When ur world comes crashing down on u, d sun has stopped shining n all u c is the cold wilderness, u start losing hope. U try 2 reach out 2 it but d glimmer of hope starts fading n disappears fr ur sight.
When u lose d person who means most 2 u in ur life, how do u feel? If they don't hate u but r indifferent 2wds u, how long can u withstand dis? When u've lost d only purpose n meaning in ur life, how can 1 continue when all he can c is d n coming 2 nought? How much longer can 1 hang on? D saddest ting in d world is 2 ve d person u love most turn his back on u n treat u wif apathy. How can u stop d pain which is killing u inside?
How much longer can 1 perservere when each beat of ur heart hurts like a stab? Shedding countless tears when u relive d happy memories.. reming d simple but happy times watching tv 2gether, going 2 d movies, laffing 2 gether, having meals 2gether, seeing him smile makes u lose control. Sharing dreams of d future n suddenly everyting's gone in a flash, hw do u handle it? If in a day, a person suddenly ignores u n treat u s if u don't exist does it mean ur existence no longer means a ting 2 him? If he pushes u away, do u reach out 2 him? U can try 2 understand his viewpoint but if he refuses 2 say a ting wat can u do? Was it all an illusion or was it just a dream in which u've 2 awake sumday?
Ur imagination goes wild but u refuse 2 look at d present n instead seek refuge in d past memories. 4 it's d safest n most comforting.. drawing strength 2 live on, but d walls seem 2 b crumbling.. mayb it wld b much simpler if 1 lives 4 himself n not 4 d 1 he loves..
U wish 2 no hw he's feeling whether his heart weeps wif u. u 1 2 understand him, hope he's fine n not struggling wif his emotions inside but if he does not speak a word, does he 1 u 2 no? If he does this 2 make u give up, r u able 2 do so even if u no u can't gif up: 4 he has become everyting in ur life? U've never thgt of a life wifout him coz all u wish 4 is 2 b wif him, 2 look after him n b there 4 him 4ever. U always feared losing him n when this comes true, will u run away fr everyting when u no longer ve d courage 2 carry on living wifout him?
If only love was simple. since both parties love each other, y is it they can't b 2gether til d n? is it d lack of will or faith wich stops them? Or 1 or both parties dun 1 2 try anymore? Is love weak but we've been blinded by it 2 c that it's strong? What does I love u truly mean?
What if it seems s if he doesn't care anymore? What if he persists in doing so noing u'll b hurt but u can't let go? Wat if he refuses 2 tell u d truth? Is it 2 punish u 4 ur mistakes? But u can't force urself 2 b angry wif him or hate him.. 4 u can't stop loving him.. All u rem is d tenderness in his actions n words b4..
imlost...
inafairytale
